by Tanta on 7/26/2008 09:43:00 AM

I checked Google news this morning to see if there were any follow-up stories on Carlene Balderrama's suicide. There wasn't anything new, except this "press release" from some illiterate do-it-yerself PR website:

(Atlanta, Georgia) - Ransom Enterprizes, LLC a national real estate consulting firm has been consistent with training foreclosure consulting businesses how to properly assist homeowners with stopping foreclosures. Today the consulting firm announced to offer a free information report to homeowners facing foreclosures, an effort to prevent suicide attempts to stop foreclosure.

According to Kyle Ransom president of Ransom Enterprizes, LLC he was extremely sadden when he learned about homeowner Carlene Balderrama actually taking her life because she was unable to resolve her foreclosure problem.

One is then directed to Ransom Enterprizes' website for this "free information report."

The Foreclosure Rescue Kit™ comes fully loaded with information that you must know before approaching the bank to stop your foreclosure! Important forms to help make your forbearance package look professionally prepared. Answers and solutions to help you save your home from foreclosure fast! Complete step-by-step guide to surefire you STOP Your Foreclosure in 72 Hours or Less!

Ransom Foreclosure Rescue Kit™ Includes:

Blank Financial Statement Forms
Account Number and Property Address Placements
Required Documents Checklist
Foreclosure Process Overview
Foreclosure Prevention Overview
Hardship Letter Overview and Samples
Mortgage Financing Overview
Credit and Budgeting Overview
Professional Fax Coversheets

Make sure that you have all of the right knowledge to save your home from being foreclosed on by the bank. Your home is an investment that you must protect and you must act fast today to prevent the bank from foreclosing on it. Time is your worst enemy and the longer you wait the closer your home remains in danger of foreclosure.

Special Offer! Get Foreclosure Rescue Kit™ Today $99 Regularly $349 (Limited Time Offer)

Apparently the "free" part involves the wise counsel on this webpage, such as this:

If you file a bankruptcy the bank will not allow you to do a special forbearance or loan workout plan! Be careful of bankruptcy attorneys who encourage you to file bankruptcy before trying to work something out with the bank first. Once you see the fees that go directly to the bankruptcy attorney you will know exactly why they want you to file a bankruptcy.

It is, of course, simply false that filing BK means the bank will never work something out with you. But the chutzpah of someone who charges $349 for some blank forms, information that is freely available on the web or at a non-profit housing counseling agency, and a fax coversheet accusing BK attorneys of looking to enrich themselves is quite stunning.

Madre de Dios. If you or someone you know is seriously depressed because of financial matters and is contemplating suicide, you need to call your local suicide prevention hotline, your doctor, your priest or rabbi or minister, or if you have no other resources, 911. Ask whoever answers the phone for an emergency referral to a qualified counselor. The first priority here is to save a life, not deal with foreclosure paperwork.

Absolutely the last thing you need to do is send $99 or 99 cents to some huckster on the Internet who is simply offering to sell you a packet of papers that puts the onus back on you to try to solve a terribly stressful and complex problem. Someone who is trying to get you to pay for "professional fax cover sheets" is not trying to help you. If you are feeling suicidal, you are no longer in a position to try to do this yourself, with or without some "kit."

And if you aren't suicidal, you don't need to spend a dime on this "kit" either. I normally try not to make absolute claims about the world, but I will make one now: no mortgage workout negotiation has ever been turned down by a lender because your fax cover sheet wasn't pretty enough. Not now, not ever, not a happening kind of thing. Anyone who says or implies different is lying to you in order to make a fast buck off of you. And even if you want to believe that a pretty fax cover sheet could make a difference, you would want to obtain one from someone who can write grammatical and correctly-spelled English. Which would not be "Ransom Enterprizes."

I am not willing to hold the media outfits who have been flogging the Balderrama story responsible for its co-optation by sleazeballs. I am, however, suggesting that the media exploiters of this story just created a narrative line that lets the "stop foreclosure" hustlers position themselves as caring folk who just want to prevent suicides. And that makes me want to throw up.